The right conversation with the sommelier transforms dinner. The wrong one wastes the pairing. The framework is simple if you know the language.
What to tell the sommelier
Budget
The single most important thing. Tell them upfront. "Tonight my wine budget is $200 per person" or "I'd like to keep it modest, around $100 per person." This sets the entire pairing.
Preferences
Red vs. white preference. Old World vs. New World. Sweet vs. dry. Recent wines that you've enjoyed.
Restrictions
Dietary considerations. Allergies. Specific avoidances (some travelers avoid certain regions).
Goals
Are you celebrating? Trying to learn something new? Drinking comfortably with food? Trying to impress someone? Each implies different choices.
Course pairing or by-the-bottle
Are you doing wine-by-the-glass course pairing or one bottle through the meal?
Questions to ask the sommelier
"What's the kitchen most proud of tonight?"
Lets the sommelier suggest dishes that pair well with their best wines.
"Is there something interesting from the cellar I should consider?"
Sommeliers love showing off their library wines. They'll often suggest something you wouldn't have found on the list.
"What would you drink with the (specific dish)?"
Specific question. Specific answer.
"Tell me about (a specific wine on the list)?"
Lets the sommelier educate. Ask about provenance, vintage, the producer.
"What's the sommelier's pour tonight?"
Many properties have a special pour the sommelier wants to share.
What to avoid
"Recommend something good"
Vague. Useless. The sommelier doesn't know what you mean.
"What's the most expensive wine?"
Wrong question. Price doesn't equal pleasure.
"Any cheap red?"
Insulting. The cheaper wines on the list are often the worst values.
"Whatever you think"
Unhelpful. The sommelier wants direction.
Skipping wine pairing because "we don't drink much"
Half-pours work fine. Tell them to pour smaller.
Etiquette
Glass selection
Sommelier presents the bottle. Confirm vintage and producer. Allow the pour. Taste. Either accept or politely indicate concern.
Wine arriving cold
If a red arrives too cold, ask politely for it to warm. Don't drink it cold and complain later.
Wine arriving warm
If white wine arrives warm, ask politely for ice service.
Damaged wine
If a bottle is corked (smells of wet cardboard), the sommelier will replace it. This is normal.
Half-pours
Always acceptable. Just ask.
Tipping
The sommelier is often under-tipped. Tip the sommelier directly — separate from the dinner tip — for excellent service.
$10-$50 for the sommelier on a $200-$1,000 wine bill, depending on quality of service.
When the sommelier earns the trip
A great sommelier turns a good meal into a memorable one. The conversation is the difference between drinking wine and learning about wine.
Five rules
- Always state your budget upfront
- Specific questions get specific answers
- Library wine is worth asking about
- Tip the sommelier separately
- Half-pours are normal — just ask
For more, see the food and drink pillar.
